I Am Drowning:

Written By:

Alexis Herrera

I am drowning.

My hand is outstretched.

At least I think it is… isn’t it?

I am waiting for someone to save me

but this ocean is endless,

and I move with the current like the water.

I am drowning—

but you wouldn’t know.

My screaming sounds like seagulls.

My hair is braided with seaweed.

My lips turn blue to match the coral.

I am drowning—

but you couldn’t tell.

You build your moats and castles

with the very water that fills my lungs.

You are blinded by the rays of the sun,

and deafened by the crashing waves.

I am drowning—

but you don’t notice.

I jumped in to save your sinking boat

after I taught myself to swim,

but I never learned to hold my breath.

So I float with you on my shoulders,

paddling desperately to the shore

while saltwater burns my nostrils.

We are drowning—

but I hide it well.

Do I hold your boat and sink us both,

or let it go for my own air

and hope you brought a life vest?

Do I pretend not to see you drowning?

I am a lighthouse—

expected to never burn out,

entrusted to keep you safe, to bring you home.

I am the lighthouse keeper

who never changed the bulb

because I jumped in to save your sinking boat.

And in this self-inflicted darkness,

I blindly swim toward a shore that may never come

and pretend to forget—

I am drowning.